In sailing, the technique used to move against the wind is called tacking. In common use, tacking is the concept of making progress by zigzagging rather than moving forward directly. For adult children helping their parents transition from one home to another, tacking can be a useful concept.
I was sitting in the lobby of an assisted living residence when a resident met his son at the door, hugged him, and asked, “Where’s Mother?” “Mom’s dead, Dad,” said the son. “She died three days ago. Don’t you remember?” “What, mother died?” he said, grief and panic written on his face. Less than a […]
Thirty years ago, my 92 year old grandmother tried to kill herself. They called us from her personal care residence to say she had been found unresponsive, with an empty bottle of pills by her bed. My brother and I rushed to the hospital and heard the sound of her stomach being pumped. For […]
Last week, I met a woman and her dog walking along a nature trail. As dog lovers do, we started to talk. She said she and her dog walk the two-mile nature trail daily. Recently, she had tried to adopt a second senior dog, to keep her 8-year-old dog company. The rescue organization said that […]
Helping someone you care about when they don’t want help is complex. When do you honor their wishes, and when do you superimpose your own beliefs out of a conviction that your instincts are correct? Several years ago, my husband and I faced this question with my mother-in-law. It was among the hardest and most important things […]
Guest post by Jean Long Manteufel Dear Jean, Father’s Day is coming up. I don’t know what to get for Dad. He has lost so much of his memory. At times, he doesn’t even know me. Why bother? Dad isn’t the same person he used to be. Sometimes he thinks I am his younger brother, […]
“Bill, there is something wrong with the fan,” I said to my husband, in another room. He walked into the kitchen, tried the cooking spray, and said, “There is nothing wrong with the PAM.” Life has been interesting since we started mishearing.
Yesterday, a friend reminded me about a conversation we had a few weeks earlier that I had forgotten. “I’m beginning to worry about you,” she said. Then I began to worry about me. Was this an indication of something serious? I began checking for other signs of forgetfulness. Nothing stuck out. I handle a million […]
I thought that using a cane would make me feel dimished. Instead, it has made my life larger. The following is a guest post from Andrea Frayser of The Intentional Caregiver: I have to make a confession. This has been the hardest post for me to write. I have sat down, time and again […]
When I started Moving Solutions 18 years ago, I knew I was in the business of aging, not the business of moving, so it is not surprising that my writing is about aging as well. When you delve into the details of people’s lives, as Senior Move Managers do, you observe the impact of caregiving and […]